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Neanderthals: Y'know, that entire species of human we maybe killed

I really love Neanderthals.

TELL ME MORE, COMPARISON CHART

This has been a slow-growing love, possibly owing its beginning to the Field Museum's exhibit on the cave paintings of Lascaux, which made me realize what a condescending dick I'd been to People of the Past. I was astounded to learn they had needles and thread and candles. This was almost 20,000 years ago. I'd assumed they just walked around grunting and hitting each other with rocks. But no! They had hats. I don't know why hats are a major sign of civilization, but they are.

I've discussed before how frustrating it is that all this took place in our prehistory. We barely know anything. And what we think we know is probably wrong. A book I have on Cro-Magnon man from like two years ago says modern humans and Neanderthals probably never interacted, and then we find out that basically everyone whose ancestors emigrated from Africa has 3-5% Neanderthal DNA, meaning our ancestors totally did it with Neanderthals.


It bugs me that how our civilization came to be this way is COMPLETELY SHROUDED IN MYSTERY and we're not talking about it. Probably because we can't know anything about it due to the shrouded-in-mystery part. Because People of the Past were apparently too lazy to write shit down. THANKS FOR THE BUFFALO DRAWINGS THOUGH THOSE'RE GREAT.

Thanks also for whatever the hell this is

At some point we decided to structure families the way we do now. At some point men suddenly had way, way more power than women. At some point this was decided. Maybe the women were super-pissed. Maybe they were just happy they were going to survive. We don't know and we will never know until we build a time machine come on people make this happen. Ugh, even if we DID build a time machine, we wouldn't be able to talk with them. We'd probably just get stabbed with spears.

Even in Illinois, we have this sort of infuriating thing. Cahokia Mounds in southern Illinois? Oh, just one of the largest cities of the 1200s. No, no one talks about it. Because we know like nothing about them.

Just disappeared

By the way, Cahokia is four and a half hours from Chicago and someone should drive there with me because there is a museum and MIDWEST HISTORY.

But back to Neanderthals. They existed. A whole other species of human. Do you know what kinds of questions that raises. At the very least theologically, because the Bible doesn't talk about other types of humans. Not that it gets that specific when it's talking about something other than the length of an ephod, but where do other species of humans fall in this whole God-made-man thing? Neanderthals had souls, right? THIS IS WHAT I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT.

You know what the Bible DOES talk about? Nephilim.

The Nephilim were on the earth in those days--and also afterward--when the sons of God went to the daughters of humans and had children by them. They were the heroes of old, men of renown.

THIS IS IN THE BOOK I HOLD FAIRLY SACRED. It's basically like "Oh hey, Greek heroes? Now you have an excuse to believe they were real. Also that CĂș Chulainn guy. And maybe Paul Bunyan, but only if he lived way longer ago."

Basically I just want to go to the Rock of Gibraltar 30,000 years ago and fish with Neanderthals.

It'd probably look exactly like this 

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