Reading Rambo

You guys. I am totes into NBC's  Timeless . Ok, so you've got the dissatisfied-with-her-job-and-life lady history professor (Lucy), the stoic military dude whose wife has died and he's got a lot of SILENT FEELINGS ABOUT IT (don't know his name), and the tech guy (Rufus), who legit says "I am black; there’s literally no place in American history that would be awesome for me." A mysterious man steals the main time travel ship that some other mysterious man (rando billionaire) was building, so they recruit these three people to take the other, lesser time travel ship and chase after him and try to stop him from DESTROYING AMERICA. As the New York Times's review says, "'Timeless' isn't good, exactly, but...it combines enough goodish elements to be enjoyable." A-greed. In the first three episodes, they've visited the Hindenburg; the site of Lincoln's assassination; and Las Vegas in the 1960s. This week: something w...

I normally keep my feelings about Swan Queen aka Emma and Regina on the terrible ABC show Once Upon a Time out of this space, because BOOKS and so forth, but last night's episode (that I didn't watch but saw recaps of on Tumblr) was the Swan Queeniest and I can't handle that this show, after five seasons, still has not put these two women together. Yeeeeah.... If any of these scenes had happened with a guy and a girl, the audience would be clamoring for them to get together, but because it's between two women, the Swan Queen fandom has to deal with a ridiculous amount of harassment and negativity. It took ages to even get the show's creators to acknowledge  Swan Queen as a thing, which is ridiculous because it's definitely the most active fanbase for the show (#motivatedlesbians).  Even if you ignore the size of the fandom, the way the show has structured Emma and Regina's frequently combative relationship is textbook for enemies who e...

I need to review Sarah Vowell's Take the Cannoli: Stories from the New World , but first, WTF kind of game are you trying to play, Once Upon a Time ? These are people's hearts on the line and you pull this kind of shit. I am not having it.  I mean, what the hell. You can take a swim in an overly polluted rabid shrimp-infested lake, Once Upon a Time writers. You give us that look exchange between Emma Swan and Regina "The Mayor" Mills? QUEERBAITING SHALL NOT CONTINUE. (... #SwanQueenForever ) Now. I read a book by Sarah Vowell. As previously noted , I have a born-from-loneliness attachment to Sarah Vowell, as her book Assassination Vacation was there for me at a time when everyone around me spoke French and I just wanted a hamburger. Since then, I've read all her books as they've come out, and fervidly recommend them all. This was the last one to read, aside from her book about listening to the radio which, unless someone shoves a copy at me...I'm...

Reign . What a great show. Do you like ridiculous levels of drama? Do you have a penchant for young people standing on cliffs looking windswept? Do you casually enjoy references to a dark wood next to a castle that no one should enter because PAGANS? Well then journey on over to the CW, my friends, and examine their 16th century offerings. (and by 'to the CW' I mean Netflix, 'cause no one has regular TV anymore) When Reign premiered, they had some kind of viral marketing campaign all over Chicago, and I said "NO. I will not watch a show about Sexy Mary, Queen of Scots and support more revisionist bullshit about her. NEIN." Because I have highly disliked Mary, Queen of Scots ever since I started loving Elizabeth I (around age 15) because how could you NOT? My feelings are best summed up by this graphic I made back in the day to illustrate their differences: But Reign  focuses on Mary's early life, i.e. when she lived in France and was betrothed to the...

You know, I've been watching Criminal Minds on Netflix, and I don't know how the later seasons are, but season 1 seems...weird. Weird in that no one aside from the profilers seems to know these incredibly violent crimes are happening. "IT'S JUST US, YOU GUYS." There was one case where all these upper middle class women were being murdered DURING THE DAY in their nice suburban homes, and it was something ridiculous like six in a five mile radius and women were STILL LEAVING THEIR PORCH DOORS OPEN. I'm sorry. A guy tried to break into my apartment ONCE, did not even succeed or murder anyone, and I still wouldn't let my roommate put the air conditioner in the window all summer. (love you, roomie) In another one, whole families were being murdered and the news was seemingly just NOT AROUND FOR IT. Yeah, I guess that's kind of boring. People probably shouldn't be told. I'm seriously worried about the world in which Criminal Minds takes pl...

I enjoy the 4th of July the same way I enjoy Labor Day. There's no especial pull to go outside or associate with family members, and you're pretty much allowed to celebrate however you want (people give you shit about Halloween, I'm just saying). True, I ventured outside my apartment on occasion, going on a not-date with a girl and her pregnant friend, seeing Snowpiercer (excellent except for the stupid, stupid ending) and doing up the Renfair with my roommate. HOWEVER. There was also a lot of Netflix. Documentaries are excellent to have on while cleaning, as they do not require as much attention. I needed to clean my room, so I put on Bronies: The Extremely Unexpected Adult Fans of My Little Pony and quickly STOPPED cleaning, because holy shit, Bronies. I cried four times during that documentary. I'm not sure it merited it, but it happened. Fandoms are a weakness of mine (OBVIOUSLY) and I'm easily reduced to a weepy mess when people start talking about th...

On occasion, we of the human race have nights where DESPITE the knowledge that we shall be sleep-addled lunatic zombies in the morning, we find ourselves wide awake and needing to watch some YouTube vids (probably Emma Stone interviews, because that girl sparkles). I took the day off from work yesterday, and thus it was a day of auditioning, library visits, pancake-eating, and Luther -watching. Which ended roundabout 1:30 AM. THIS BEING THE CASE, I have some strong television opinions I will now be sharing. The OUAT season 3 finale has happened. And all I can say is It was a flaming pile of fail, and for something (acknowledged by me and many others who watch it as Not a Good Show) that one's invested so much energy in to act THAT way, it's like if you told everyone how much you love this one kind of soup. And how awesome the soup is and you're really looking forward to eating it. And you go to the restaurant and the chef makes the soup and brings it out, but...

Not being able to go outside much means I am READING MORE, which I guess is good. I mean, I also watched ten episodes of the CW show Arrow on Saturday. Mainly for Oliver Queen/Felicity Smoak, which can be summarized thusly: that's the ship. But IGNORING Arrow  (and the totally awesome season 3 of American Horror Story , which I've ALSO started and do you know how rarely I sit down and get into a show nowadays because it is never I am telling you), there was reading done. Mostly of short novels. Also called "novellas" even though they could totally be called "shnovels" which is obviously way better. 1. The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry. Remember? The bookseller! Who adopts the kid! And he learns something about life. And it's all "Heyyyyyyyy book people, you're gonna like me," and we do. 2. Safe Passage . Ok, I got this from NetGalley, because around Valentine's Day NG was all "HEY do you wanna read lesbian romances?" ...

Work is deathly boring today (Halloween pun kind of!), so here is my unsolicited post capturing pretty much everything I tweeted about The L Word , the show that carves your heart out with a spork, then throws its head back and laughs. All you need to know is that Tina and Bette have been together seven years at the beginning of the show and are the cutest ever, and then Bette cheats on Tina at the end of season one and EVERYTHING GOES TO HELL AND THERE IS NO RETURNING. (...until season 5). Oh, and also Jenny is the worst. Season 1 Tibette (it's the ship name, damnit) Seasons 5/6 Tibette Seasons 2 through 4 TWEETS: -How my day was supposed to go: clean room, get life in order. How my day went: watched 12 episodes of The L Word. So that's great. -"I don't want a relationship with you; I just wanna be with you all the time." #stillwatchingthelword -Wait, Bette and Tina make out while stuck in an elevator? Is this show fanfic on film? IS IT? ...

I published my readalong post before midnight SO I GET TO POST AGAIN TODAY. Such are the rules. Also I've sucked at posting lately and tomorrow's Moonstone Day (did you all see my addendum about researching the Siege of Seringapatam? very good). Sooo today's gonna be about Legend of the Seeker . Said post is inspired by  Meg's most recent post , and if you're not following Meg, WHAT ARE YOU DOING GET ON THAT. So. Legend of the Seeker  is based on a terrible series of books by Terry Goodkind. I mean, I picked up the series thinking "All right, this probably isn't going to be very good," and it was WORSE THAN MY LOW EXPECTATIONS. However. A tv series was made and aired a few years ago on ABC and I watched the first few episodes and went ZOMG THIS IS THE BEST BUT ALSO THE WORST BUT ALSO THE BEST. Basically, Legend of the Seeker is the prettiest. The writing's cliché, the acting's so-so, and its special effects are those of fair to middling sc...