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Excuse Me, But I'm Very Important and Busy

I do the opera singing, yes? Yes. And that, with my day job and church obligations (did I mention I am a Most Holy Elder at my church? Not that we're supposed to call ourselves that, but this is my blog, so bam), means I don't have a lot of time for ye olde reading. And when I DO somehow get a free day, my mind goes "Ehhhhh you don't REALLY want to read, right? You can watch reruns of Daria. That seems like a productive use of your time."

Anyway, the fall is when young artist program auditions mainly happen, which means I should be cloistering myself in a practice room (i.e. my bedroom) for hours on end, only coming out to grab the occasional tub of hummus and then skulking back. So of course this is the time when I have not two, not three, but FOUR books I'm really excited about. FOUR.

1. Picnic at Hanging Rock - This is one of my favorite movies. And I just added up the different movies I've seen (...I have a boring job; I don't recommend doing this, for you will weep over the time lost in your life) dating back to 1931, and it's at least over 1,000. So out of ONE THOUSAND MOVIES, Picnic at Hanging Rock is probably in my top 10. I looked for the book at the library, and the entire Chicago library system has one copy. Which I am currently reading. It has lovely lines like "Even as a little girl, Irma Leopold had wanted above all things to see everyone happy with the cake of their choice." 

 It's pretty slow, like the movie, but in a lovely way. If you don't know it at all, it takes place in 1900 in Australia, a group of schoolgirls goes to Hanging Rock for a picnic (eh? like the title? see?) and four go missing. If you require closure, this is perhaps not the book for you.

2. Doomsday Book - OMG I AM INTO THIS BOOK LIKE WHOA. But it's currently on pause, because it's way long, and Picnic is like 200 pages. But it involves time travel and the 1300s, and BOTH those things make me really happy. And guess who was the queen in 1320? ISABELLE OF FRANCE. Who is one of my favorite monarchs of ever. She's the French princess in Braveheart played by Sophie Marceau, WHICH, by the way, is one of the only positive portrayals of her in film. She's commonly perceived as terrible, but she had a super-shitty life thanks to her husband Edward II, so let's all cut her some slack and remember she was the mother of Edward III, who was kind of cool, yes? Sure.

Oh yeah, the book. So I've read a bit of it and it's amazing. Like, as I read, I get sad, because there is thusly less of it. Boo.

3. The Crimson Petal and the White - This looks so fricking good I can barely contain myself. It's postmodern and Victorian, which are my two favorite things, because things being meta STILL blows my mind. Like, in Possession, when Byatt's talking about fairytales and is all "Because we all know, don't we, that the elder two brothers must fail and the youngest must win the hand of the princess" (or something like that), and I was AGHAST because you know these rules but you don't TALK about them.

So yeah. This looks great, but it is also massively massive, which makes it difficult to carry around the streets of Chicago without looking like a hunchback. Plus I got those two others mentioned above.

4. Beauty Queens - By Libba Bray. This is probably the least laudable of my selections, but I've seen it praised in like three blogs. I mean, Lord of the Flies for ladies? Okay. I tried reading Lord of the Flies twice, and I put it down both times, because I was completely bored. "Hey, I wonder what'll happen if we put a group of young boys on an island." "OMG They're HORRIBLE to each other!"

Don't try telling me it's about other things. Because I don't care about those other things. This book is described on Amazon as "Teen beauty queens. A Lost-like island. Mysteries and dangers. No access to email." I mean, all righty then, sold. I'll read that. And it's currently sitting on my bed along with these other books.

Whatever, I can have opera AND books. Sandwich and Floyd. All! I can have it all!

I can't find the appropriate gif of Liz eating the sandwich, so here's the Cheesy Blasters song:




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