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Monkalong: The Final Monkening

You guys. When Antonia died because of course she did since she'd been raped, this is exactly what I said to Matthew Gregory Lewis:

"WHAT DO I DO WITH THIS NOW USELESS WOMAN?" Lewis cried. "Oh, I'll just have her get murdered, 'cause since one dude violated her with his dick, now no one else can have her. She is literally ruined. I know it's 'technically' not her fault, but I think we all know it's her fault."

Antonia's dead, Matilda was a demon the whole time, and Satan threw shade at Ambrosio.

"Scarcely could I propose crimes so quick as you performed them."


WHAT TO EVEN THINK OF THIS BOOK. It's just a giant exercise in "let's feel superior about Catholicism and also write the most salacious things possible." But! It's semi-famous and people still publish it. And now we know what, like, 50 Shades of Grey was in 1796. 

You know what else was published in 1796? Fanny Burney's Camilla and Jane West's tracts written as "Prudentia Homespun." So basically we probably should've read those. Except THOSE don't end with Satan flying a monk over a river and dropping him next to it so all his bones break and insects eat him. Or so I would assume.

This book was bonkers. I'm glad we read it.

Also HAPPY BIRTHDAY MEGS I love you tons and I'm sorry you had to read about demon nuns right before your birthday. OR AM I?


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