Wherein I Feel Like Wearing '90s Plaid and Listening to Nirvana

You know when you had a three day week and then you go back to work and you have a five day week staring back at you and you just kind of sit listlessly at your desk and glare at the phone every time it rings?

What? No, that's totally not me today. No, I'm way chipper. But for reals, this:




But I also don't want to be home, because I've been home for too long, so if I go there, I'll just be moping in a different place. So instead I have chosen option 3, which is to mope on my blog. Hello!

I mainly just want to sit here and be listless, but that's not a fun blog entry and it's been SO LONG SINCE I'VE UPDATED, which you might not have realized, but I do because I update all the time and it's been something ridiculous like five days. FIVE. Okay, let's think of a topic.

Twilight. Man, let's get into Twilight today. The craze is pretty much over, thank God, so this hopefully won't devolve into some kind of vitriolic diatribe, but let's address what's appealing about this series aside from the super-obvious "omg Edwaaaard!" factor (note: you do not need to find him attractive, but enough teenage girls/older mothers do that we can consider this a legit factor). 

I've gone off on enough rants about it that I don't feel the need to defend my hatred of it. It's terrible. It's ruining our younger, dumber people, and it's promoted by Christian moms while they condemn Harry Potter. And that sucks. But have I seen all the movies? Well, yeah. Three of them in theaters. Why? Because 1) Not having to try to struggle through Meyer's text makes the basic story a lot more palatable. 2) Who doesn't like seeing teenagers be all angsty? 3) When there's dialogue like this:

Edward: I'll see you at the altar.

Bella: I'll be the one in white.

you get to groan with your friends, and that, good people, is fun times.

I even own Eclipse. On DVD/blu ray. I own it because it goes into characters' BACKSTORIES and involves period costumes and these things make me happy. I love backstory. Also whenever I don't want to think about, y'know, real life shit, I can put that on and see Jacob glaring balefully at Edward because Bella chose to go to prom with him which is UNFAIR because Jacob spent so much time being a good friend to her and how can she like him how MY TEENAGE EMOTIONS.

Remember when you were ages 11-15 and everything seemed like an enormous deal, and then you went to college and people who were dicks you just kind of stopped hanging out with, and the biggest drama was that you were out of Coke and the convenience store was two blocks away and it was really cold out? 

It's entirely possible other people had more exciting college careers than I did.

Basically, I think reading the books actively pollutes your brain, but the movies are kind of fun in a these-are-terrible-movies sort of way.